A Day at the Huntington

 The Huntington Library and Gardens recently traded their famous Gainsborough's Blue Boy for a painting by Joseph Wright of Derby called An Experiment on a Bird in the Air Pump and I had been meaning to go and see it. Time was running out for the bird (and me) as the painting was returning to UK end of May so I decided to get out there for the Memorial Day weekend. The painting didn't disappoint. 

 

I first heard about Wright when my daughter studied Art History in high school. His pictures combined Baroque techniques with enlightenment ideas and depicted science in action. In this one we see an eager audience around a lecturer demonstrating the importance of air to life as he slowly sucks out air from a glass jar housing a cockatoo. I would like to think he will not kill the bird and will actually revive it. It is a riveting scene and you can see the anguish on the little girl to the right although I don't know what the two lovers on the left are doing at a science demo gazing at each other!

I loved this painting much more than the Blue Boy and felt this was more fitting for the Huntington which also houses a number of rare manuscripts and books. When I see the Ellesmere Chaucer, the Gutenberg Bible, the Tyndale Bible, Newton's Principia a Shakespeare's First Folio, Thoreau's Walden drafts, Whitman's hospital notes, Audubon's unbelievable bird sketches all under one roof, I get goosebumps. In an era where we are seeing ridiculous book bans some of these books remind us of the revolutionary power of the printed (or handwritten) word.

Ellesmere Chaucer's Canterbury Tales

Newton's Principia

Gutenberg Bible -only 48 survive of which 12 were made from vellum including this one

Tyndale's Bible - god's words in your own language!

First Folio opened to Midsummer Night's Dream

 

Thoreau's Walden draft

Audubon's larger than life book of bird drawings

The great thing about the Huntington is that it houses samples of extraordinary writing by women too. All my heroes are here - Mary Shelley, Revolution printed by Susan B Anthony and Elizabeth Cady Stanton, works of Octavia Butler and Hilary Mantel. I don't know if it is simply a matter of coincidence or whether my interests drive me towards certain things, but each manuscript here held a special place in my heart.

Mary Shelley's cross-written letter to her friend Marianne Hunt

One of my favorite biographies was "Romantic Outlaws" which was about the mom/daughter pair of Mary Wollstonecraft and Mary Shelley told in alternate chapters. So I am a bit familiar with what Mary Shelley is writing about in this letter - an account of her personal tragedies.

Butler's notes for Parable of Sower

Here is a writer I came to late - maybe about a decade ago when I first read Kindred. Following that I read both Parable of the Sower and Talent followed by Lilth's Brood. It is only fitting that all her papers are in the Huntington as she was a Pasadena native.

Mantel's research for her Wolf Hall trilogy

The books that marked the last decade for me are absolutely Mantel's trilogy about the rise and fall of Cromwell. I loved the books so much that I am now reading Diarmaid MacCulloch's biography of Cromwell. This was a nice surprise as I didn't recall seeing Mantel's manuscript at the Huntington before. This wasn't the only surprise for me. 

From a distance I saw this bird on the grounds and for a second thought it was a Phainopepla but as I took a closer look it was unlike anything I had seen before. Merlin to the rescue and with both photo and sound id the bird was identified as a Red-Whiskered Bulbul, a native of India that had first found it way to Florida. Along the way some birds escaped the aviary and seem to have established themselves in places with exotic fruit plants. Made my life-list! 

That wrapped up an amazing day for me! On the ride back home we overheard a Proust quote on the radio "The real voyage of discovery consists, not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes." These past few years travel has been impossible but books remain the cheapest way to transcend time and space. It breaks my heart that we are living in times when books are banned but guns are not.

Guns in America

 It has been a horrific couple of days - one more mass shooting in America and this time in an elementary school. This is an all time low even for the US and as a mother this was just heart breaking. When I picked up my daughter from school I couldn't even imagine what the moms of the 19 kids in Uvalde would be going through at that moment. After Parkland I was hoping something would change. Then we heard about the scandals associated with the NRA and their bankruptcy and I thought, if not now then when? And now Uvalde is here and will anything change at least now? 

How can we have a party that claims to be Pro-life also be Pro-guns? For them, life seems to begin at conception and ends the moment the head emerges and the umblical cord is cut. After that a child can be brought into a world without healthcare, with little to no food security, and be exposed to horrific violence in schools  - those don't seem to matter to those beholden to the NRA. 

How many times have we heard the phrase "guns don't kill people; people kill people." What kind of crazy argument is that? Yes at the end of the day a person wields the weapon, but the kind of weapon matters. Just look at history and how warfare has evolved - from the crossbow, to poison gas, to nuclear bombs, the number of fatalities has correlated strongly with the type of weapon. The solution is not arming schools! When has more weapons been a solution to anything? Is there any justification for any civilian to own a semi-automatic? Countries like Australia and NZ have shown the positive effects of banning such weapons. How many more kids should die before we start learning from these countries. But those countries don't have a right to bear arms enshrined in their constitution - another common retort. How about the right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness that 19 kids in Uvalde are never going to be able to enjoy? Does the right to bear arms trump the right to pursue life, liberty and happiness? I am sure the founding fathers would agree that semi-automatic assault-style weapons in the hands of any citizen with no background checks was not what they had in mind when they drafted the second amendment.

I have to concede i am not hopeful. I hear statistics like 90% of Americans want to have some kind of gun control, some form of universal background check - not this patchwork of state laws. I also know the NRA is hurting, but it looks like there are other lobbies that are powerful. It is also true that conspiracy theories are at a peak right now and that has driven more people to gun ownership. In the nearly 25 years i've lived here I've seen Columbine, Parkland and now Uvalde. At each point I thought a major change was coming and I have been disappointed. I know emotions are running high right now and I am sure the other side is going to say we cannot legislate anything right now. Can we at least repeal the Dickey Amendment and get some funding for research into gun control policies?

No parent should have to deal with a tragedy like what happened in Uvalde. If we cannot unite around this I don't know how we can deal with all the other challenges that we are up against.

Books (and/to) TV

 I've been catching up on books and TV shows these past few weeks. Normally I am nervous about TV adaptations of books that I've enjoyed but maybe it is the GoT effect, these days TV adaptations of books are turning out to be very good. So here are some of my reviews on things I've been watching and reading.

 The one that has topped my list is AMC+'s The North Water. I had picked up Ian McGuire's book back in 2016 when it came out on the basis of a blurb from Hilary Mantel and loved it! Slow burn, dark and moody, arctic atmosphere and great prose. It is a great story about the ending days of whaling, the misdeeds of the Raj in colonial India, fraud and murder, adventure and survival and a meditation on (toxic) masculinity.  So I was thrilled to find out that it was made into a TV series starring Collin Ferrel and Jack O'Connell (who was terrific in Godless which incidentally is one of my all time favorite series on Netflix). The show didn't disappoint. The acting was impeccable and the visuals were spectacular. The show is not a popular one as it is not available on the Big 3 streaming platforms and you need a subscription to AMC+ but it was totally worth it. If you don't believe me, here is a link to the BBC's review of the show.

This Christmas being stuck inside with Covid I spent it with Deborah Harkness' All Souls Trilogy. I am normally not a fan of vampire stories, but I came to her books through an interview she did for the Folger's Shakespeare Unlimited podcast. I loved the premise about a lost manuscript and different creatures hunting for a book that held the key to their origins. I had also recently finished Janet Brown's two part biography of Darwin and this series, about the origin of species albeit of a different kind, came to me at the right time and I finished the first one during the two week Christmas quarantine and decided to complete the trilogy. I had no intention of watching the TV show but since i had gotten a month of AMC+ for the sake of North Water, and this one was also available I decided to give it a try and this too was a very successful adaptation. The books are definitely more satisfying but the show is still terrific for someone who doesn't have the patience to go through three door-stoppers.

Next one on my list is The Essex Serpent by Sarah Perry. It was first published in 2016 and I remember buying the book in an international airport (not sure if it was Changi or Chennai or Heathrow) because at that time the book wasn't available in the US yet. Perry specializes in gothic fiction and Victorian literature and that genre appeals to me. This is a very slow read and at times it feels like nothing really happens, so I was not sure how the TV show would be. So far three episodes have come out on Apple TV and with a stellar cast and outstanding production values I am going to finish this one. Of all the Book-to-TV recos I have, this one was my least favorite book and by extension could become my least favorite show, but will reserve judgement until the series wraps up.

Pachinko is my last of the Book-to-TV recommendations. Loved the book when it came out a few years back and the TV adaptation on Apple TV is wonderful too. Korean cinema and TV is garnering worldwide audience these days thanks to Parasite and Squid Game. Pachinko is very different as it tells the fate of a family matriarch tracing her background from the colonial times when Korea was under Japanese rule through modern times. The book was a big hit when it came out and the tv show is amazing too with some terrific acting. However, only season 1 has been completed so the story leaves you hanging in the TV adaptation. Not sure when season 2 will arrive. But the book is already here and can satiate your curiosity.

That ends my Book-to-TV reviews. I will now switch gears to books I've been reading this month and here is a brief summary of those that have left an impression.

Klara and the Sun is by Kazugo Ishiguro who needs no introduction. Winner of the Nobel prize for literature Ishiguro is someone not bound by genre and his books bridge genre and literary fiction. This book is getting rave reviews for its portrayal of a dystopian world where AI has advanced to the level where a child can have an AF (artificial friend) and gene editing (with some risks) is available to elites who want to assure a great future for their kids. He raises a number of questions on the ethics not just of technologies like gene editing, surveillance, AI but also the disparity in the access to these tech and how humans treat their AF companions. The book was a quick read but at times it seemed too simplistic to me. Maybe that was intentional as he wants us to think about what is real and what is a simulacra and does it matter. However, I was waiting for something to happen and it was a bit disappointing. I've concluded that it is a matter of personal taste -  I just prefer his books like Remains of the Day, Artist of the Floating World to his dystopian fiction.

In Search of a Kingdom by Laurence Bergreen was a book that has been on my radar for a long time and i finally read it this past week. It tells the history of how Francis Drake transformed from a lowly pirate to a Knight  and helped transform the lowly island to an Empire and secured Elizabeth's position on the English throne. An ex-slaver who turned away from slavery seeing the cruelty of the Spanish, Drake was driven by just one thing - exacting revenge on the Spanish - which coincidentally suited his monarch who didn't want to wage an all out war on the Spanish. Instead Drake's targeted piracy weakened the Spanish so significantly that its effects were seen during the defeat of the Spanish Armada. Incidentally Drake also circumnavigated the globe and didn't meet with the same fate as Magellan. Drake's piracy was also relatively more humane than that of other conquistadors and explorers. He treated the indigenous people he encountered (like the Cimmarons of Panama or the Miwoks of the Pacific Northwest in America) with respect and reserved all his disdain and cruelty for the Spanish. Keynes (yes the famous economist) estimates that Drake's piracy helped Elizabeth pay off all of England's foreign debt and left her with 40,000 pounds in hand which she invested in the Levant company whose profits led to the East India company which in turn led to the looting of India's wealth and the establishment of the British empire. The book is fast-paced, easy read, full of interesting facts like how 007 came to be a thing based on a cryptic cipher by John Dee, Elizabeth's historian. 

Speaking of fast-reads, action adventures The Lost City of the Monkey God by Douglas Preston was another nonfiction that reads like a fictional tale. The book follows a group of US & Honduran archaeologists and documentary filmmaker Steve Elkins' attempt to discover the archaeological site referred to with numerous names - the White city, the City of the Jaguar, the City of the Monkey God- from the time of the early conquistadors in the Mosquitia region of Honduras. While numerous explorers from the 1930s at various times have claimed to have discovered the city, Preston debunks many myths and this team with the help of Lidar technology did the first proper aerial survey of the site. While there was a fair share of criticism about the effort from other experts who were not part of the exploration, the discovery of the site has been hailed as a source of national pride by the Honduran government and to the team's credit they did not stop with the Lidar survey but risked their lives in ground truthing the data with actual field work in the jungles with many of them contracting leishmaniasis due to their exposure to parasites in the jungle (Dr.Fauci plays a minor role in this regard). I haven't watched the documentary but I hope to at some point as both the story of the civilization and the story of the discovery are equally intriguing. It was also good to hear about something positive coming out of a US-Honduran relationship.

I am glad I read all these books and am double glad that I finally took the time to write about them. Sometimes when I read one book after an other they all get muddled in my brain and taking the time to even write a few sentences helps fixing some of these books in my memory for longer term. As summer is around the corner i am building up my reading pile in anticipation. I was reading a review of Emma Smith's upcoming book Portable Magic and the guardian review states "Her title, borrowed from an essay by Stephen King, emphasises the mobility of these apparently inert items and their occult powers. Like motorcars or metaphors, books transport us to destinations unknown, and that propulsion has something uncanny about it." Needless to say that book is on my reading pile as it echoes my sentiments completely.

Taking a Break

 After 25+ years in the corporate world, I decided to hit the brakes on my career this week. I am not part of the pandemic induced she-cession or the great retirement. This was something that I had always planned to do even before the pandemic hit us. I had tried to quit once before, early in my career, when my then infant daughter first went to day care and came home with multiple ear infections. Thanks to my mother and spouse who supported me through those tough days and a very understanding manager I was able to manage both home and career without quitting. This time around there is no such compelling need, other than the fact that my daughter will be a high school senior this fall and before I know it she will be out of the home and I will sitting on an empty nest. I decided if there was ever a time to take a break this was it. Some people called my decision "courageous," others lauded me for choosing family over career. I honestly don't think I deserve any of these comments. I recognize that I am lucky enough to be able to afford a break like this.

This is an experiment - my Walden - but unlike my hero, I am not isolating myself. I am just trying to be more available for my family and practice being present in the moment as opposed to running schedules in the back of my mind and flitting from one thing to another constantly. Reading, volunteering, and birding have always been part of my life. But I am hoping to do these more mindfully.  In the past when I wanted to learn something new I always did it alongside managing my home and career. I am hoping that with a bit more leisure i will have the opportunity to follow up on areas of interest in depth. Maybe I will finally finish Ulysses and I am hoping to call my mom more frequently. Beyond these I don't have specific goals. I am not calling this phase my retirement because I don't know what's in store for me and no one can predict the future. And I am not doing this to help my daughter's college application process. Sure, I hope to travel with her this summer to colleges that are on her list that I had never heard of until now. There is not much I can do other than listen to what she is / is not saying and follow her lead.

It's been a week and I am happy to report that I haven't experienced any withdrawal symptoms or regrets, yet. Sure, I miss the people I used to work with but I don't miss the daily grind. This Mother's Day didn't feel any different from the last one either. On our way to the local pond for some birding time (which has become our traditional Mother's Day thing to do) we didn't see any chicks which was quite different from our experience last year. Disappointing? Well, yes at first. But then I told myself maybe the chicks have all successfully fledged and we were just a bit late this year - which reminded me of my own fledgling standing next to me and the ephemerality (if that's a word) of life. If I had any second thoughts about taking a break, the pond with no chicks/fledglings removed the last vestiges of doubt. Now as Gandalf reminds me "all I have to decide is what to do with the time that is given me."

The Great Stone-Face that Melts Hearts

 

 I don't recall when I first heard the name "Buster" Keaton. All I remember is that somewhere in my teen years my dad, who introduced me to most pop culture, mentioned his name as one of the great silent-movie stars as good as/ even better than Chaplin. Growing up in India I had only seen Chaplin comedies and never had a chance to see the Great Buster. So when I moved to the US in 1998 following my marriage, I promptly asked my spouse to point me to three things 1) the nearest library 2) the nearest video rental place 3) the classic movies channel on TV. Thus began my adventures with Buster. I watched all his movies first by myself and then with my spouse and then with friends to whom I evangelized (one literally fell off our couch when watching the boxing scenes of "Battling Butler" - which inspired Raging Bull) and then when my daughter turned 7 or 8 she too was initiated into the Busterian cult. Why, then did I wait so many years to write about The Great Stone-Face?

Well, two biographies of Buster were released this year and I promptly got James Curtis' Buster Keaton: A Filmmaker's Life. I might still get Dana Stevens', Cameraman, but I wanted a complete biography and Curtis' book was the one that offered that. 700 pages of Buster took me about a week to get through and during that time I re-watched all the movies and shorts that I so adore, this time with my teenage daughter who claims that I always introduce things to her too early and therefore she ends up needing a re-introduction. It has been a riot watching these shorts and movies with her while I read the book in parallel. Now I had more insight into the films and could pause and explain to her how a shot was made and the context. 

Before you read:If you don't know anything about Buster, please watch the links I've provided below. If you know something about him but don't know what the hoopla is all about, please watch this short clip on the Art of the Gag.  

I always preferred Buster to all the other comedians. I don't think Chaplin or Lloyd can equal him. He was a consummate filmmaker, actor, cameraman, designer, gagman, stuntman all rolled into one. No cheats, no shortcuts. This much I knew before I read the book. Now I have an even greater appreciation for him when I realize all the challenges he was up against. The underwater scene in Navigator was shot in Lake Tahoe in extreme cold temperatures and with him actually staying under water in the ridiculous diving suit. The famous house collapse in Steamboat Bill was actually executed in one take and even the cameraman closed his eyes when the house collapsed. The motorcycle scene in Sherlock Jr actually had him controlling the motorcycle from the handlebar with no brakes. He even stunted for the driver. There are many vaudevillian tricks in Sherlock but I was blown away to find that every shot on the pool table was executed by Buster after hours of practice! I can watch The General any number of times and still be awed by everything he did, especially when the bridge collapses. Curtis' book provides so many engrossing details on each of his shorts and movies that it is a must-read for anyone interested in Buster, the art of movie-making, or just films in general.

However, where the book truly excelled for me was the myth-busting biography of the second half of his life. I always thought that talkies killed his career. I was completely wrong! What (almost) killed Buster's career was losing creative control to the studios, especially MGM.  Buster was first and foremost a creative genius with a core team that helped execute his vision (Gabe Gabourie, Elgin Lessley come to mind). Directors like Mal St.Clair, Eddie Cline were quick to know when to hand over the reins to Buster as no one knew the camera and the audience as much as Buster did. He was also a technophile so it was not new technologies that killed his career in the second half. When MGM decided to treat him just as an actor who needed to be managed closely and not use his special talents it sent him on a downward spiral that turned him to alcohol and led to failed marriages. Even with all that Buster worked continuously and was still delivering pretty solid commercial hits. 

My admiration for Buster the human being, solidified when I read about how he dealt with the downward spiral and came back for a third stage of his career. He went from a $3000/week salary to $100/week writing gags for other artists just to pay the bills. "If I am worth more, they will pay more" was all he had to say when a reporter goaded him about his fallen fortunes. From villa to moving back with his parents, accepting any job that came his way, I don't think he ever stopped working until he died. His third marriage to Eleanor was a lifeline and she helped him beat alcohol and supported him in every way possible that when TV came along Buster was back. He helped identify Lucille Ball's potential helping her hone her audition, wrote scenes for Judy Garland, mentored so many other comedians and did it all behind the scenes with no credit. And during this third stage of his career he saw the revival of interest in his films which were now acknowledged to be greater than anything Chaplin did. He had no fights with Chaplin and acknowledged him all the time, something that Chaplin could never do. When asked who he thought were the greatest comedians, he listed Chaplin first among men and in the same breath said Lucy among the women. He never thought that his movies would have a life beyond two years, let alone few decades or centuries. 

As a human being Buster is a shining example of how to deal with adversity with grace, what it means to mentor others, being committed to the gag with a dedication that is unparalleled and being gracious when crediting others. While I always admired the genius, it was the humanity in him that moved me to the verge of tears. At many points in the book I had to stop, close and collect myself as I could not believe that such a person truly lived! This book is a triumph because the life that is told is a triumph! I watched The Railrodder a short he made few months before he died from lung cancer. I saw the 70 year old Buster (who did all the stunts) and could see the same vitality of the guy who made The General in 1925!

I know there needs to be a discussion about racism in Buster's movies and frankly I am not qualified to address that. However, it is not addressed in Curtis' book although I am told Dana Stevens' book has a chapter on Black-face and minstrel traditions in Buster's movies and shorts. I was listening to Larry Wilmore interview James Curtis (incidentally one of the best interviews and discussions on Buster I've heard) and he mentioned that someone needs to do a proper book on minstrel shows and use of ethnic humor in Antebellum America. When we watched The General last week, my daughter said that not watching the Confederate flag in color made it a bit more palatable and it didn't make her top 3 list because of the theme. Why did Buster reverse the story and show the Confederates as winning this particular battle? Was he a Lost Cause supporter? The truth most likely was the fact that he didn't want to make fun of the losers and felt that making the Northerners as a butt of his jokes was acceptable given they already won the war. The Playhouse is truly a ground breaking innovation in cinema but that's one short that i can't watch because of the minstrel aspects. My daughter does not like Paleface because it makes her uncomfortable to see white people dressed up as Native Americans, even though the theme is that of white man stealing the land from Native Americans. To put him context, Buster was born around the time of Wounded Knee, about 30 years after the Civil War. So it is hard for me to label him a racist even though there are some racist stereotypes in his pictures. While I am not excusing these portrayals I also don't want to dismiss these pictures as just racist tropes as they are truly much, much more than that. After all very few directors have 7 of their movies preserved by the National Archives. I am going to go out on a limb and say that Buster is like Shakespeare. Yes, there are problem plays (Shrew, Merchant of Venice, Othello) but the overall canon is very uplifting and timeless and helps us question our own assumptions.

We compared notes on our top 3 Buster movies and shorts. Here is my list (most of it are available for free on youtube as the copyright has long expired)

Full Features:

1. The General
2. Steamboat Bill Jr
3. Sherlock Jr / Cameraman

Shorts:

1. Neighbors/ One Week
2. Cops / Goat
3. High Sign

Here is her list (She hasn't yet watched Seven Chances, Cameraman)

Full Features:

1. Battling Butler
2. Steamboat Bill Jr
3. Navigator
   

 Shorts:

1. The Goat
2. High Sign
3. Daydreams / Electric House

As I am writing this blogpost, I am reminded that today is the 100th anniversary of Cops one of my all time favorite shorts which my daughter and I watched this morning. Buster has been performing since he was a toddler and here we are a hundred years later still watching him. On his death Dick Van Dyke eulogized him by reciting the poem God Bless the Clowns! I feel truly blessed that my dad introduced Buster to me and I was able to do that to my daughter who I am pretty sure will be a Damfino for life and introduce the joys of Buster to the people she meets.  As a tribute to Buster, my daughter and I have solemnly sworn to wear the "Blinking Buzzard" earrings to any movies we will watch from now on!

This "Fool's" Eulogy For Her Uncle

 It's time for me to write another COVID eulogy - this time for my maternal uncle. With his passing my mom has now lost all her siblings and this one was especially hard as he basically book ended another COVID death, that of his wife back in 2020. I wrote about my aunt's passing in September 2020 and that was the last I talked to my uncle. He was 82 or 83 and lived a full life. It was not an easy one by any means as he always shouldered more responsibility than anyone else I knew, but I know he never dwelt on the difficulties and towards the end was blessed to spend sometime with his lovely grandkids.

I am personally grateful to him for a number of reasons some of which I talked about when his wife passed away. Now that I have had a few days to reflect on his life I felt I needed to say more. My grandmother used to say that my uncle had a lovely singing voice (something we've never heard) but he didn't have the luxury to indulge in music as he had to find a job at a young age and take on the responsibility of his family. My grandfather (who I never met) was diabetic and always ill. In addition he was naive and quick to anger. So he could not be relied on for a steady income and my uncle had to take on the burdens of providing for his family at a young age.

I have never seen him express love but actions always spoke louder than words. My mother wouldn't be where she is without his unflinching support towards her education and her career which made her financially independent at a time when most Indian women depended on their husbands for everything. My mom recounts how he was at her side when I needed a surgery as a baby and even yelled at my dad for not making it on time. He enrolled me in my kindergarten and I used to go to school staying with him. From that point onward he was there for every aspect of my life - my first school, my first job, my first trip abroad and being his niece he played an important role at my wedding. He was also by my side when my dad died. I remember a cook at the funeral didn't want to take the money from me (a woman) and asked if my uncle could hand him the check. My uncle refused and said - you take it from my niece who arranged everything or we will take your services for free!

What I admired the most about him was his directness in speech and action. He never used flattery or fancy words. He came to the point quickly, said everything to your face, and more importantly didn't do it to offend anyone personally. He was careful about money and didn't believe in frivolities. Long distance phone calls were not wasted on unnecessary niceties. The other thing I truly admired about him was the fact that unlike so many other aging Indians I know he would never once make me or any of us who owe so much to him feel guilty! I didn't have to call him regularly or inquire after him. He cared that I was happy, my child and husband were doing good and my career was going fine - but I didn't have to personally convey that to him. There was no "reading between lines and taking offense" - an art so many elders seem to have mastered - with him. Never once has he said things like "for everything I've done for you..." - these phrases never came out of him.
 

When he turned 60 many years back I got him a nice, designer shirt - not because I owed him that, but because I genuinely wanted to celebrate his birthday. I could see he was touched, but he said and I quote "Fool! Why do you waste money on me? You take care of yourself and you don't have to do anything for me." If you met him briefly you might not see the gentleness behind the rough exterior but if you took the time to warm up to him you were in for a treat! Even now my brother and I quote many of his pithy sayings and we find ourselves laughing over them. He never troubled anyone when alive and that's how he died. I heard that he donated his organs and I am sure he probably didn't want his son to go to any extra trouble regarding his last rites. 

People say that I have some of his features as my mom is just a female version of her brother (When I was a teenager I was once approached by a random person at a bus stop who asked me if I was related to Ramachandran! )As I look back on his life I hope I inherited more than his looks and the directness of speech - I hope I have the sagacity to adopt a WYSIWYG approach to life, not heap guilt on others and dwell on difficulties. I am sure if he read this eulogy the only thing he would've said would have been "Fool! Don't get sentimental." So I will stop the gushing now and simply say THANK YOU Mama!

Power of the Voice

 As a regular listener of Tiny Desk I am especially grateful to NPR for bringing these three artists into our lives - Khaira Arby, Tamino and the unbelievable Silvana Estrada. So when I heard Silvana was touring and was going to be in LA, I promptly got the tickets as I knew my 16 year old would not want to miss seeing her live. But is she worth driving through 3 hours of Friday evening traffic from San Diego to LA, standing outside for 30 minutes waiting for the doors to open, then listening to the opening act (Doris Anahi who was also really good!) for another 30 mins (all standing) and then hearing her for an hour and a half (continuing to stand) and then driving back home close to midnight? The answer is ABSOLUTELY YES!

 

My daughter and I were probably the only folks in the 400 people theater who did not speak/understand Spanish, but that didn't mean we didn't know the music. This was just pure soul, something that struck you deep inside whether you are 16 or 60. This was my daughter's first non-Classical/ non-Indian music concert and what a glorious way to start! She was so grateful to me for doing all the driving on a working day, but I told her that this was something my dad would do for me (except he never drove any vehicle, so i had to drive him to accompany me to anywhere I wanted to go) when i was her age and I am only paying forward. My dad's family loved all arts and were not limited in who or what they admired and I am so thankful for that openness in my upbringing. A soulful voice is a soulful voice is a soulful voice! Throughout the concert, although we were probably 6 feet away from her, we could not believe that she was real and her music was actually coming from within her.

 

I also have to say what an amazing crowd of people to share the music with! With the pandemic we all have lost what it felt to share a live experience with a bunch of strangers. This concert proved how important that was to the human experience. Here we were amidst a sea of strangers, most of whom spoke Spanish and seem to know the lyric of every song, sharing the delight of music. People were so kind and typing into my daughter's phone any song title she had not heard before, or just being polite not blocking the view and being sensitive to each other.

Doris Anahi in her opening act talked about how blessed it is to be from two cultures and that was a feeling my daughter totally understood. When she creates music she borrows the best from her two cultures and to hear such strong, thinking, feeling, emotional young female voices was life-affirming for her. Thank you Silvana Estrada for giving my daughter and I an experience that is firmly etched in our shared memories!